THE POSSIBILITIES OF SOFTENING
Things I heard growing up…
You need to study HARD.
You need to be TOUGH.
You need to learn how to CLENCH your fists and BUCKLE UP.
What I didn’t hear…
You need to be SOFT.
GENTLENESS is important.
Keep it LIGHT.
Our relationship to “softness” is deeply entrenched in our familial and cultural practices. The language of softness is oftentimes missing in the way we express ourselves, what is happening in our bodies, and how we are relating with each other.
But what would happen if we invite “softening” in our lives and in our daily practices? Yesterday in a mentoring session (as part of my work as mentor for Vision 20/20), I invited my Buddygroup to think of:
“What are they holding on too tightly that they can invite some softening?”
This prompt led us to very interesting discussions on areas in our lives that need softening:
- Attending to our Inner critic
The inner chatter that we often hear as we take a break, pause or pivot in life can oftentimes be challenging. The questions and judgments swirling in our head can be:
- Is what I’m doing enough?